Manipulative people can be described extremely easily. They are people who try to pass on their own interests as yours. In other words, they suggest you do a number of things that may seem like they’re good for you when, in fact, they only benefit themselves. So, how to deal with manipulative people? Do you cut them off completely? What if they’re family? This is what we’re here to find out.
1. Ignore Them
One of the best ways on how to deal with manipulative people is simply to ignore them. Sure, you could just cut them out of your life once you’ve noticed that what they seem to do and suggest to you is manipulation but that’s not always possible. The people who manipulate you can be a coworker, your boss or a family member. Therefore, this means you have no easy escape out of this such as cutting them off completely. At least, not right away.
Therefore, what you can do is ignore them. Act normally around them, listen to them, and have the same conversations. However, when it’s time to act, use your free-will and take action independently of what they advised you to do.
2. Stop Feeling Guilty
Compromise and guilt should disappear both from your vocabulary and your plethora of feelings if you’re dealing with manipulators. Remember – they do not have your best interest at heart. They are only following their own agenda and using you. Therefore, why should you compromise or feel guilty that you didn’t act as they told you to?
What’s more important – never allow them to make you feel guilty for being happy or successful. Manipulative people will often do that, so they can keep you close to them. Once you’re successful or happy away from them, they get scared they might lose you. And so, the belittling and manipulation start.
You might also like – How to Manipulate People: 5 Strategies
3. Do Not Ask for Permission
From anyone. Asking for permission is, unfortunately, a result of the way we were all raised. During our childhood, we had to ask to be given food, a change of clothes, to go outside and play, for toys, and so on. In school, we asked for permission to go to the bathroom, to speak or to eat at a certain time. There was no freedom involved, and our brains were conditioned to ask for permission all the time.
It continued into adulthood with bosses who again do not allow free speech during meetings, don’t permit questions of any kind, make you ask for permission to bring a photo of your child for your desk and so on.
However, you need to understand that you don’t have to ask permission from the people in your life with whom you do not have a work-related relationship. This means friends, family or a spouse. You are an adult capable of making his or her decisions at any given moment. There are no rules holding you back, and no one can tell you what to do. If members of your family, friends or spouse are telling you what to do on a daily basis, they are, probably, trying to manipulate you.
Here are three ways on how to deal with manipulative people. Pay attention to the individuals around you, discover which ones are manipulating you, and then you can ignore them, stop asking for permission from them, and stop feeling guilty when you don’t do what they say.